October 22, 2010

Change....It's Supposed To Be Good.

I love Summer.

I love flip flops and tank tops.  Sunburned skin and 100+ degrees.  Kiddie pools and chilled cocktails.  BBQ's and eating outside.  Campouts and roasting marshmallows in the fire pit.  Blooming flowers and overgrown gardens.  Spending the day at the river and messy cheeseburgers.  Sleeping in and staying up WAY to late.  I love that it stays light until 9:30 at night.  If I had a daughter, I would have probably named her Summer. (Actually, it would have been Sophia, but you see where I'm going with this.)

I have been putting this off for a while. Honestly, who wants to accept that summer is truly over? It's getting colder outside. I have to close my windows at night and I hate that, I feel claustrophobic. I've been pulling my jeans out and am reminded of the few extra pounds of baby weight that have fit so nicely into my flowly summer dresses.  I have been reluctant to decorate for Halloween, because it means the start of the holiday season...and frankly that freaks me out. (Seriously...stressed just typing it.) 

Everyone is talking about how they L.O.V.E. the Fall.  The colors are so beautiful (and in fact, they truly are).  The air is crisp.  The scents are heavy and oddly comforting.  Soups and Stews.  Your favorite mug of something warm and snuggle blankets.  Rained in movie days.  It all sounds great....but I'm just not feeling it. 

To me fall and winter are cold.  Dark and depressing.  Lots of time inside, when my family CRAVES being out.  My home feels so small in the winter time.  I hate layers of clothes, they feel too heavy like they are weighing me down.  I hate getting up when it's dark, eating dinner when its dark, feeling like its 10 o'clock when really it's only 6.  Muddy boots and wet clothes drug all through my hallway.  The yard and everything in it looks so sad, as if it's being punished for something.   I feel as though summer just up and left, without saying goodbye, like a jilted lover leaving in the middle of the night....and it took everything I loved with it!

I don't feel like I truly got to embrace summer the way I wanted to.  We didn't get to the river or the ocean like we had planned.  I didn't spend enough time with my family.  I surely did not see my friends nearly as much as I'm used to (you know who you are and that issue needs to be fixed ASAP!)
Yet here it is.  It's happening and there is nothing I can do about it. I know that I will come around to embrace Fall for all of it's beauty, but right now I'm just not ready.  I don't think of it as being depressed (no need to feel my pain), it's more like a 5-year-old stomping her foot down and shrieking..."NOT YET!" (Arms folded with pouty lip for full effect.)  It's supposed to rain this weekend and we have 2 more soccer games and football games...couldn't the nice weather hold out for just a little longer? Pretty Please?!? 

What's your favorite thing about Fall???


  1. First, I LOVE the new look of the blog!!! Second, if you were referencing us (and I hope you were)---I agree. Remedy needed soon! I love the colors of fall and the crisp air. But I also love putting away the fruity drinks, white wine and grilling gear only to get out the warm drinks, red wine and warm winter comfort meals. Now the only thing missing is you guys to come over and enjoy!!!!

  2. Well it's no secret that I feel exactly the same way you do. Fall leads to winter and that's really hard for me. We have snow now...so it's already winter in my mind. It's dark at 5 so I just want to get my jammies on and climb in bed. BUT I guess that is the up side of things...it actually makes you slow down and hunker in a bit.